- By Ajeet Kumar
- Sat, 05 Apr 2025 06:12 PM (IST)
- Source:JND
Shaun Flores was 11 years old when a friend showed him porn for the first time. Now 30, he remembers how it grabbed his attention right away. "I was amazed," he told BBC. "It looked like people were having so much fun," he added. But soon, that curiosity turned into something he couldn't control. Shaun started watching porn all the time-- morning, noon, and night. He says it became as normal as brushing his teeth. He shared his story in a new BBC iPlayer series called "Sex After".
"I couldn't stop..."
"I knew something was wrong when I had no energy for anything else," he says. "I didn't want to play football or go outside. I just wanted to stay in." He felt guilty and ashamed, but no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't stop.
Shaun isn't the only one who struggles with this. A 2024 report from Ofcom says 29 per cent of UK adults watched online porn in May that year. Another study by UKAT, an addiction treatment centre, found that 1.8 million people in the UK watch porn every day, some even multiple times a day.
Number of people with porn addiction has surged: Therapist
More people are now asking for help with porn problems. Dr Paula Hall, a therapist at The Laurel Centre in London who helps people with sex and porn addiction, says the number of people coming to her for help has doubled in recent years. She's also seeing more young people in their 20s and 30s, many of whom are single. They say porn is making it hard for them to have or keep relationships. Ten years ago, most of her clients were older married men in their 40s and 50s, often caught by their partners using sex workers.
Lee Fernandes, a therapist at UKAT, also says more people are seeking help for porn issues. Before 2020, they got one or two requests a week. Now, they get several every day. He thinks it's because porn is so easy to find online. "Anyone can take out their phone and watch porn, whether they're 12 or 60," he says. "It's worrying."
Why people choose porn over lives
Fernandes says people watch porn for different reasons, like curiosity, boredom, stress, or not feeling satisfied with their sex life. But he warns that it can be very addictive. "It makes your brain feel good with dopamine," he explains. "Once you start, it's really hard to stop."
Problematic porn use might feel like an addiction, but doctors don't officially call it that. Instead, they call it problematic online pornography use (POPU) or compulsive behaviour. For people who can't stop watching porn, it can cause a lot of problems. This is especially true for young kids who can easily find hardcore porn online. Seeing too much of it at a young age can have a big impact on them as they grow up.
10 per cent of kids watch porn by age nine: Children's Commissioner
The Children's Commissioner for England works to protect kids' rights. Their research in 2023 found that 10 per cent of kids had seen porn by age nine, and 27 per cent by age 11. Dame Rachel de Souza, the Commissioner, says kids tell her that seeing porn is very common for them. On average, kids first see it at 13 years old. She also says porn isn't just on adult websites anymore. Kids see it on social media too, and it often shows violent, harmful, or degrading acts. This can be dangerous for them.
Solution of porn addiction
Her research shows that kids who watch a lot of porn are more likely to act in aggressive ways during sex when they're older. Dame Rachel says it's really important for schools to teach kids about healthy relationships and sex, just like they teach other subjects. This can help kids understand that porn isn't real life.
