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In today's digital dating landscape, the rules of engagement are constantly evolving and the emergence of new, toxic trends has become a disturbing norm. The proliferation of dating apps and social media has created a culture of disposability where connections are fleeting and easily severed. As a result, a new generation of daters is navigating a complex web of relationships where the lines between intimacy and isolation are increasingly blurred. Two particularly damaging phenomenon, ghosting and gaslighting have become all too familiar to many of us. Ghosting, where someone suddenly cut off communication and leaves the person feeling shocked, confused and deeply rejected with no closure.

Gaslighting, a form of emotional manipulation where a person is made to doubt their own perceptions or sanity can be equally devastating. As these behaviours continue to evolve and intersect, a new and equally disturbing trend has begun to take shape and that is ghostlighting, one that combines the worst aspects of both ghosting and gaslighting, leaving victims feeling lost, confused and utterly drained. Let's understand more about this toxic dating trend that everyone is talking about.

What Is Ghostlighting?

Ghostlighting, a destructive dating phenomenon merges the painful abandonment of ghosting with the manipulative tactics of gaslighting, characterised by an abrupt vanishing act followed by a return that distorts reality, ultimately eroding the victim's confidence in their own perceptions. This emotional game reopens wounds, causing confusion, distress and erosion of self-trust. Unlike ghosting which brings a painful closure, ghostlighting perpetuates uncertainty while blurring the lines between truth and fiction and leaving a lasting impact on the victim's emotional well-being. This toxic behaviour leaves long-lasting effects on the individual.

ghostlighting trend

Ghostlighting is a latest toxic dating trend (Image Credits: Canva)

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Why Is It More Harmful And Toxic?

Ghostlighting's insidious nature lies in its ability to erode trust and self-esteem, leaving victims questioning their instincts and doubting their emotions. By combining the abandonment of ghosting with the reality distortion of gaslighting, ghostlighting creates a toxic cycle of emotional manipulation. Acknowledging this behaviour is crucial to break free from its grasp. By acknowledging the signs of ghostlighting, individuals can establish boundaries and shield themselves from the psychological harm it inflicts, ultimately reclaiming control over their emotional well-being.

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Red Flags For Ghostlighting

Sudden Disappearance

The person suddenly stops responding to messages, calls or interactions without explanation.

Inconsistent Communication

They may send mixed signals such as liking social media posts but not responding to direct messages.

Denial or Minimisation

When confronted about their disappearance, they downplay or deny it, making you question your own perceptions.

Emotional Whiplash

You're left feeling confused, anxious or uncertain about the status of the relationship with your emotions constantly being pulled in different directions.